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Unrequited Love in Senior High

By: Jc Urboda

12-Sartre


The first day of Grade 11 felt like stepping into a whole new world. The hallway buzzed with laughter and chatter as students reunited after summer break. And then I saw him. Nat. He sat near the window, sunlight landing perfectly on his face, like he was the main character in some K-drama. My heart did a backflip. 

“Heyy, CJ! Stop it, you're so creepy, ” Keanna teased, laughing. I rolled my eyes and went to my seat, but inside, I was smiling. Weeks passed, and I got used to seeing Nat every single day. I watched him recite during class, laugh with his friends, and even borrow my pen once — which I never wanted to lend to anyone else after that.

Then came our first big group activity. “Group 3: CJ, Nat, Rian, Rebecca.” My whole face heated up. Rian smirked and whispered, “Omg CJ, manifesting works right!” We pushed our desks together, and suddenly, I was sitting across from Nat. “So, who’s doing what?” he asked, looking straight at me. “I can handle the intro,” I said, trying to sound casual. “Good. I trust you,” he replied with that smile that made my heart skip a beat.

The group activity was full of little kilig moments — our hands brushed when passing papers, he leaned close to read my notes, and we even joked about our answers. “You're in good in writing CJ,” Nat said casually. “Flattery won’t get you a higher grade,” I teased. He laughed softly, and that laugh stayed with me for the rest of the day. But with every passing week, my feelings for him grew stronger — and heavier. By December, I couldn’t keep it in anymore.

December 24, 12:00 a.m. Everyone was posting Christmas countdowns online, and I was sitting alone in my room, staring at my phone. My heart pounded so loudly I could almost hear it echo. I typed the message. Erased it. Typed it again.  Finally, I just hit send: “Hi Nat… Merry Christmas. And also… I just wanna say I like you.” The minutes felt like hours before his reply came. “Oh… wow. Merry Christmas also, CJ. Thanks for telling me.”

That was it. No yes. No no. Just that calm, polite answer that left me wondering if I should feel happy or sad. I stared at his message for a long time. My heart ached, but strangely, I was smiling too. At least now he knew. Even now, I’m still in love with Nat. We’re still classmates, still laughing in the same room, still living in that quiet space between confession and answer. Maybe one day I’ll get over him. Or maybe one day he’ll tell me how he really feels. Until then, my heart stays here — quietly, stubbornly loving him.

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